The Childhood & Bad Habits

Ever since I was little I can remember my parents telling me, "Don't waste food! You know there are starving people in China, India, Africa, Samoa" *depending on the mood and day you could pick a country and it was mentioned by my parents. It wasn't their fault. I'm sure it was told to them by either their parents growing up or they learned it from watching the news. Either way, wasting food was not an option. If your plate wasn't finished and there was more food on it, we never threw it away. It was to be saved and eaten at another time. Leftovers did not last long in our house either. It was eat or starve!

Although my parents were good parents, meal time rituals were never established consistently. We never had a set time of 6pm is dinner, 7am is breakfast. It was sort of a free for all, like many Polynesian households I have seen. You pretty much eat whenever something is cooking, but if nothing was cooking you better find yourself something to eat. As a young kid, I would pretty much have to tell them when I was hungry and then they would feed me. Having children now, I know that establishing meal times and controlling what they eat is not only attainable, but imperative. It shapes their habits all through their life. I only say this from experience.

My sleeping schedule was another thing that was thrown up in the air. I slept when I wanted to and stayed up as long as I wanted too. It sounds like my parents were horrible, but at the time, they didn't know better. They were going through a phase because I can honestly say that when they started to go to church & really settle down, it became more organized. I would say that happened around when I was 7 -8 years old. We still didn't have a set ritual around meal times, but it became more consistent to expect at least dinner. Breakfast was non-existent. It wasn't that big of a deal because I never was a morning eater. I would go to school and just wait for lunch, which we all know now is UNHEALTHY!
I find it so odd that my Mom was not more into meal prep because my Grandma was a S.A.H.M on the military base in California and had breakfast, lunch, and dinner ready all the time. I see old pictures of my Mom and her siblings *all 5 of them at the time, 3 more came later* at the dinner table all nice and clean like some Norman Rockwell/Paul Gaugin mix painting from the 50's. I guess I shouldn't be all that surprised. My mom kind of rebelled throughout her life.

I think I'm just trying to hash out when and why I started eating the way I have been. Sleep time, meal time, what you are eating, all matter. It all comes down to habits. When I got into my teens I was actually more fit then I thought I was, but still eating bad. I kept comparing my body with the girls at school, which I know now was NOT fair in anyway of me to do that. I am naturally big boned, if you will. My stature is bigger then the blondes & brunettes at school. At my skinniest I still always felt huge to them because I was. My eating was all over the place. I wasn't a sweets freak or ate candy all the time. My weakness has always been starchy foods/sides. I loved rice, potatoes, pasta, bread, mac and cheese. I ate lots of chicken, but the portion of chicken compared to the portion of my sides was no match. I always loved fried foods as well. All the fatty foods. Fries, corn dogs, onion rings, mozzarella sticks, just straight up battered, fried crap.

No longer appeals to me! I just see a bunch of fat staring at me.

As I type these foods, it no longer makes me hungry which is SO WEIRD! I'm actually getting disgusted because I remember how I felt after eating all these foods. Bloated, sick, and greasy. Wow. That's a huge shocker for me and a mini accomplishment. I thought while writing all my old favorite foods I would miss them, but it was the opposite. *Sorry, I'm celebrating the fact that maybe my brain is being re-wired to think the right way about food* Anyways, sorry I'm rambling. I just wanted to write my thoughts this morning because I have been really trying to understand where I came from so I can progress and know where I am going. I want to give my kids a chance by feeding them the best and letting them feel their best. We look back at mistakes of others, our own mistakes, and just try our hardest not to make the same ones and correct as we go along.

I tried to go running this morning, but was UNpleasantly surprised by SNOW! I know Utah has the "Greatest Snow on earth", but I'm about to move out of this state because this winter was SO HORRIBLE! I have been getting cabin fever this whole winter and thought the snow was gone, but it's back. And it was like WHITE OUT blizzard snow. ANNOYING! All right then. I gotta wake up the husband for work.

Woke up to this! Others would find this breathtakingly beautiful. I , on the other hand, am SO OVER IT!

Food for thought: What bad eating habits did you form when you were younger? 

My answer: Eating while watching t.v. or reading. 2 things you shouldn't do because you are not mindful of what you are putting in your body at the time. You are more likely to overeat.

Wish me luck :)

Let Me Catch My Breath!

I just got back from my 2 mile run. Yes, you read right. I actually ran! Lol My big self actually JOGGED!

How I felt running

I felt like I was still light on my feet these days, until I ran today. I was trying to jog lightly, but the weight was weighing me down. hahaha I don't know if it was because I can hear myself so loudly, but I felt like I was stomping/jogging. The poor kids walking to school were probably like...WHOA! Earthquake.
                                                                                   

 I also got moded *Polynesian slang for embarrassed or shamed if you will* I always blast my ipod to drown out my own mind from convincing myself 1 lap was good enough and also to drown out my heavy breathing. So my ipod was blasting and it dropped out of my sleeve and so did my ear bud so I stopped to pick it up and heard someone behind me running towards me so I gasped! And yeah, it was just another fellow jogger who I almost roundhouse kicked to the face.

My hero Chuck Norris :)

That's what I get for watching "Who the #*@#$% Bleep Did I Marry" on Netflix last night. It's one of those shows like Oxygen's Snapped, where these poor women & men married people who were murderers, rapists, con-artists, etc. The last episode I watched before I fell asleep was a lady who married the Parkwood Rapist in Washington state. It was scary! It made me paranoid last night so I kept asking my husband Toa, if that's even his real name?, if he was really going to the gym or stalking women? Long story short, I am an idiot. hahaha



I am excited today because I get to try some new products out. My order of food came in yesterday and I ordered a Caramel nut bar, chocolate chip pancakes, and mostly double of whatever I liked last time. Oh I also tried the honey mustard pretzels. Yum. I like those. I used to love the Snyders of Hanover Pretzels and these are similar. The only thing I miss from my old ways is BREAD! I love bread. I miss sandwiches. Those were probably a weakness for me because I just love sandwiches. I found this recipe for Revolution Rolls on this ladies AMAZING blog/fb. http://www.sandyskitchenadventures.com/2011/09/medifast-picnic.html

New Products:

All right then. I better go. The childrens are up and already fighting. Wonderful music to my ears. I really appreciate this age because I know it's not going to last forever and I'm going to be extremely sad when they don't need me for all the little things anymore. Have a great day eRRbody! Wish me luck :)

Working it...

Yikes!

It is week 3 and I am allowed to work out! Wahoo!
I never thought I would be so happy to work out, but I guess I am. I even made my workout playlist on my ipod. It's Tuesday already and I missed my opportunity to work out on Monday because I have a sick infant who has no one else to care for her, but me. My husband could have watched her, but I know the strength a Mommy gives to my sick children. It's just not the same. Although, my husband does have a wonderful tender side that babies them. It's just not the same when it comes from me for some reason. Plus, my baby is only 10 months and she is attached. I can't be in the same room and her hear my voice without crying to come to me. Ahhh the joys of Motherhood.


Anyways, diet was better yesterday. I was very pre-occupied with spring cleaning my house so I almost kept forgetting to eat on time. The children have been doing the same. They have been busy and therefore in turn, have been eating WAY less. Our smaller portion dinners are going great. Last night I made pizza boats, which is spaghetti sauce, mozarella, green peppers, and green onions on a whole wheat gourmet sub bread.

The kids LOVED it and they only had 1 each. That is RARE in my house! They usually want 2 or 3 pieces, but they were too excited because my husband brought home an x-box game *Dance Central 3* It's probably one of my favorite games, besides all the old school games. *i.e. Mario, Tetris, Pacman, Galaga, BomberMan, Street Fighter, etc.* We really sweat last night playing because we are very competitive. When I say "we" I mean my 5 year old son and me. lol He is very good and is at the point where he can beat me, so I am going all out.

I read Dr. Andersen's fb update today and it was inspiring! Here's the link: http://www.drwayneandersen.com/2011/04/15/why-you-should-not-cheat/
It's just what I needed to read because of all the "little" cheating that's been going on with me. I am really going to try today to stick to it completely because I DO want the best results. I also, didn't know that I was supposed to eat within an hour of waking up. I wake up @ 6:00 - 6:30 every morning and the last thing I want to do is eat right away. I also feel like I'm most hungry and did most of my eating towards the evening so I would try to start eating as late as possible. I guess I was wrong! It's nice though to be honest with yourself. I feel like I am honest with myself in most ways. Maybe sometimes a little too honest to where it becomes damaging, but yeah we won't go into my head too much. *cray*

This WAS me, usually in the middle of the night snacking.

Well today is spring cleaning continued, so hopefully I will do good in NOT cheating. Sorry if my entries are boring....wait, I don't know who I am apologizing to, but if these entries are boring. STOP reading them then. :) I told you! *Cray* it's too early and I'm sitting here writing and doing all my internet surfing before the children awake and it's OVER! hehe. Wish me luck :)

Lucky Charms...

 Top O'the Morning to ya!

Happy St. Patricks Day

Weighed in this morning! I lost 4 lbs. this week. Not as much as last week, but I WILL TAKE IT! I started to walk at the park for 2 miles on Thur & Fri. I am going to try to make it my goal to walk it every day after I put my son on the bus. I know I just got a gym membership, but my car will not be fixed until Wednesday of next week so for now the park will have to do. Who knows, I just might walk 2miles in the morning and go to the gym at night to walk another 2 miles and do some light lifting after the car is fixed. My husband has been going to the gym this whole week and already lost 6 lbs. ANNOYING! Men don't have to do much, the lbs. just fall off. Women on the other hand have to give up the Oreos, chips, and sacrifice a small lamb just to lose 2 lbs. and keep it off. Not fair! WAHH WAHH!

So Sad

I am still doing good with sticking to the plan. I do find myself cheating by eating another medifast meal 2 hours after my last meal, which I hope I will stop doing soon! It stinks! I looked online though at the medifast forum and some people will have a WHOLE CHEAT DAY! I'm like WHAAAAT! I can't do that because then I'll try to justify in my mind why not 2 cheat days, then 3, then let's just cheat till I'm fat again. And that is a serious no, no. I'm not saying cheat days are stupid, I'm just saying for me and at the stage I am at with this diet a cheat day is not an option for me. Maybe when I get all my crap together and reach my goal weight, then I can investigate more of this cheat day they speak of :)

My healthy lunch I made for the kids!
Veggie burger on Whole Wheat bread w/broccoli & asparagus.

I should just focus on the positive of even though I'm cheating, I'm not eating normal fatty foods. I am proud of myself in that way. Oh, but THE MOST PROUDEST I have been is this for the past 6 days I have cooked nothing, but HEALTHY food for my kids! With every meal, with the exception of breakfast, I have been cooking fresh vegetables. For breakfast they do get a serving of fruit and over all their portions have been significantly smaller. They are in the habit of still being hungry, but I tell them go play and if they come back to me still hungry I give them a snack of fruit or crackers. It's not as hard as I thought it was going to be to keep them on this. I just pray that I can build some good eating habits for them. My husband has cut his eating this week as well!

 I am just happy we are doing SOMETHING about the way we are eating. It's weird because I was talking with my husband last night and he was saying we are saving SO much money right now. Well he said besides me not eating tons *shame* our grocery bill has gone down because of me and plus the smaller portions we are cooking. The 2nd thing is we are NOT eating out as much because I keep cooking healthy for them. And the gas it takes for us to shop/go out to eat is smaller as well. He actually said, "I can't even tell we are paying for the diet because we are saving so much from every where else". I was WAY excited to hear that.

We usually do most of our shopping for produce/fruits at Costco because it seems fresher and since I'm cooking more veggies now, we need it in bulk. Before we would shop at Winco & Walmart. Sometimes Maceys & Smith, but each grocery store to find certain cheaper items. It was exhausting. lol

My last Costco goodies stash!

I know, I'm all over the place with this entry and not even thinking much before I'm typing, but another thing has changed! My skin & hair! Before I started this diet, my skin was very discolored, dry, and I felt like I was looking so tore up and old. My hair was falling out and thinning in the front. I just noticed last night looking in the mirror that my hair is FULL! It hasn't been falling out when I brush it. My skin looks hydrated. Hydrated is the first word that came to mind because it's more smooth and I feel like I don't look tired & tore up. I don't put make up on every day because c'mon. 5 kids remember. Before I would wake up because one of the kids was crying or my alarm is blaring. Now I wake up before the alarm feeling refreshed. It's amazing to say the least.

Now what does that mean? Am I trying to sell you Medifast? NO! I'm trying to sell you on YOUR OWN HEALTH! I've wasted too much time feeling like crap, waking up dreading the days, and all around feeling like it was all too much. And by all means, I'm not saying after 2 weeks I have it all figured out. What I'm saying is, FOR ME, it was about damn time. I got a wake up call and I'm answering it full force. I'm inspired because I know this change in my life has to come about with my attitude first. It's like what I believe in. If I trust in the Lord, all else will fall into place. I didn't go into this journey without consulting my Heavenly Father for strength first. All right. I will lay off the heavy for now, but just wanted to share that with every one this morning. Wish me luck the rest of this week. I know I can conquer this bad habit and replace it with good ones. Not only for myself, but for my family.

Polynesians on a diet

Saying the word DIET in my family is like saying DEATH! It's literally saying DIE with a T! Something died and it's your soul for not wanting to do the one thing we, as a family, ALWAYS DO! Polynesians in general, whether you are Samoan, Tongan, Hawaiian, WHATEVER, are ALWAYS eating. When someone dies, when someone has a birthday, when someone is leaving, and when someone is coming home. You really don't need a reason. Let's have an "eating" because Jr got a job. Let's make a big feast because Lani's tooth fell out. Every one have an eating because I lost 7 lbs!!! Let's celebrate with food is basically the norm. I love my culture, but this is the one thing that is killing us.

It all goes back to our ancestors on the islands. They farmed, they fished, they hunted for their food. Farmed, fished, hunted...

All verbs! Action! The thing we lack as American-Polynesians is the ACTION! Of course, we have great food, great conversation, and a dance *c'mon every one DOES NOT dance at those functions, well at least not enough to work out the 10 million calories we just lovingly stuffed in our faces* Also, the ancestors of the islands probably worried about famine at times for whatever reason and became a little hoard-ish. *made up my own word* I see it when in older polynesians that come over to America. They think the food is going to run out and therefore stock up on random food. It's always good to stock up, but not eat the whole stock pile of food you are saving for a rainy day. That is what eventually happens.I'm not saying ALL Polynesians are this way, just every Polynesian I met in my life thus far. lol



Well the diet is getting better. Yesterday *Wednesday* I had a little snafu. Well, it was HUGE! Both my car and my husbands car broke down. My husbands car always breaks down because he is a mechanic and likes to "fix" junkers and ride it till it has to be declared unsafe for the road.

Whatta hunk of junk!

It is a 1989 Honda Civic and it's his baby. *don't ask me why!* So his car was in the middle of being fixed and my Suburban has been running funny, but then it just died. So now we need a new transmission. All this is just excellent news right when I am on a diet because then I started to stress. Like I said earlier, I am a worrywart so of course I stressed about things out of my control, which then made me want to eat my feelings. lol I decided I wasn't going to go full on and stuff my face with everything. I just decided to do what the Medifast pamphlet said to do, which is eat another medifast meal rather then a high calorie/carb/sugar snack else where. So I did. Then I ate another one. Then I ate another healthy snack. Mind you, I totally spaced it out into every hour, which I don't know who I was trying to kid. I then sat myself down and said, "Stop stressing, stop eating, and GO TO SLEEP!" So yeah, It was a hard day.

I more then made up for it today though because I got up @ 6am like usual, put my son on the bus, and walked 2 miles around the track/park by my house. It was GREAT! I felt great. I felt invincible, unstoppable, and mostly inspired & motivated again. So I'm back on track and hopefully there won't be any more mess ups. I added pictures to different walls in my house to give me some more motivation, rather then just quotes.  I put a picture of girls who are fit and what I want my body to look like. I'm sure my husband is loving the pictures of these random toned women. lol I was hard on myself this morning, but then thought, at least Im walking! I know it's not supposed to be easy, but I'm learning as I go along what to avoid.

 I love that it's called Habits of Health because it is what it is. HABITS! I'm still doing good with my kids too! I noticed I have been buying leaner cuts of meat and cooking smaller portions. Ever since I have been eating salad, my kids always come up to me to ask for some and they are starting to love it. I even got them loving asparagus. I am love feeling healthy and even though stressful things happen, I hope I can rise above and come out victorious. All right, going to attempt to make Spaghetti with the leanest ground beef I could find and whole wheat spaghetti noodles with veggies. Wish me luck ;)

Day 5, 6, 7, and I'm on 8!

Sorry, it's been a busy weekend for me. I have so much energy I don't know where to place it. lol

My end of the week weigh in was on Sunday morning. I was doing evenings, but someone told me the most accurate time to weigh in should be in the morning before you had anything to eat. So I have lost a complete total of 7 lbs!!!! I'm so excited! If I wasn't motivated before *which I totally was* then I'm super motivated now. I am just so happy that I feel ENERGIZED! It hit me that what you eat is REALLY IMPORTANT! Its only been the first week, but my diabetes is in control. I keep surprising myself at how cooking food and being around others eating delicious food is not that big of a deal for me. I know in my mind I am full and I feel great.

I did go to Carls Jr. with my husband on Saturday to get the kids lunch and was mad at him. I just told him he wasn't being supportive because we could have went through the drive-thru, but I think he is testing me to see if I will cheat or have those urges. *I know, whatta punk!* Anyways, as I was watching my husband and children feed their faces, I thought Why am I doing this to my family? Why would I let my kids eat this. They are just going to become like I did. Loving fast food, wanting greasy burgers, fries, and soda. That's when I decided I am NOT going to let my family go down this same path. I have to do something now before it's too late. I am going grocery shopping tonight and I am only buying HEALTHY snacks for them!






No more"fruit" snacks and instead REAL fruit! No more packaged, processed, fatty foods! I know it's easier said then done, but it's a start. I want my family to be healthy as well as myself. With that being said, I have to actually go grocery shopping right now. I will hopefully write more about my revelations as a wannabe healthy mom and a moron. lol jk Toodles. <<< that made me giggle.Can you tell I have been hearing my kids watch Mickey Mouse Club House! Mousekadoodle toodles.

4th Day..Oh yeahhh

Easy breezy. Well not EASY, EASY, but definitely breezy.

                                      

 I had a busy day today so it was my true test to if I can handle it with all that was going on. It involved waking up before the sun came up, playing taxi all day, a parent/teacher conference, and a late dinner! Oh yeah, this day was one of those days I dread because I'm in the car a lot and fast food is CONVENIENT! Let it be known, that I did NOT FALTER! I was GREAT! I'm totally like one of those monks who are fasting, except I'm not fasting, I'm dieting. Sometimes I shouldn't type exactly what I am thinking.

Anyways, I truly believe the more the days go by, the easier the cravings/wanting food for no apparent reason becomes a feeling of the past. I even opened a couple of treats for my kids today and didn't POP anything into my mouth. I am proud of myself. I did mess up though, but it was just a hiccup. See I was supposed to eat dinner at 6:00pm, but we were late to get home so I ate another Medifast snack because we were waiting in the car. Then I ate dinner at 8pm. Nothing criminal because I couldn't help the situation I was in.

 I mean I am on the diabetic plan 4&2&1 plan which is great. I have 4 Medifast meals, 2 lean & green meals, and 1 healthy snack. It's a great plan. I also have tons of energy today. I feel so blessed because I found this diet and we were able to afford it at the time we did. I don't only look at this as a diet, but a major necessity. My husband says he thinks I have the determination to make my goals and it's comforting have a support system. Especially an AWESOME Coach/Sister-In-Law behind me :)

I know I have been euphoric in these blog entries *well, not the last one* but most of the time when I write a journal or just how I feel, it comes full circle. Meaning, that it is always a reminder of how much I love my family, how much I appreciate all that has been given to me, and how much I love the Lord. All right. One more hour to go and sleep time. Wish me luck ;)